“I hope you will go out and let stories, that is life, happen to you, and that you will work with these stories… water them with your blood and tears and your laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom.”
~Clarissa Pinkola Estés, Women Who Run With the Wolves
I posted this a few hours ago but didn’t have time to make my point. What I wanted to ask was, do you also hide inside your shoes? Because I do. Inside all my nice and pretty shoes is a pair of feet that walks around carrying this huge and heavy worry for some very important loved ones…their current health status and impending health crisis, some life changing decisions and adjustments that need to be made. And then this huge need for myself to be strong and hold it together for everyone. It is maddening. Most of the time, you’ll see me walking tall and strutting about in fab shoes but today I will be brave and tell you my secret: I hide inside lovely shoes. Today for instance, walking on these Steve Maddens is someone crying for help. Please pray WITH me as I pray for my loved ones.
And tell me everything’s going to be alright.
2. The breathing style is not too different from dancing so I didn’t have a hard time crossing over. I figured that if I could dance zumba and hiphop non-stop for a half or full hour without panting, then running is indeed not a too far-fetched dream.
3. True enough, I got antsy in the beginning with long distances (like how I would get bored driving for a long period of time with nothing but repetitive movement, path and scenery). It seems to take around 48 years before the next mile unrolls itself. This poses a real challenge for me. I (with my attention issues) am always tempted to burst into random movements like maybe flip, tumble, spin, hop on pointe and even the macarena between sprints. Seriously.
4. Somehow though, I find myself smiling after each run and this is exactly what dancing does to me. Endorphins? It’s a good thing.
5. As more training days go by, I find myself wanting to run more and more. It is truly addicting. I’m barely halfway done with my 5K training iPhone app called “Couch to 5K” (go figure) which strictly requires rest days in between to avoid injury and everyday I am already fighting the urge to burst into a sprint in the middle of the day, let’s say from my desk to the copy machine and back. Now that’s really weird.
6. If I were to categorize the phases from “noob” to “getting there” in thought chunks, here is my experience so far: “It might be boring and I may look really silly” >> “I cannot run, period” >> “I will try to run because I want to see if I can do what others do (especially on Facebook posts of 5Ks and super hero marathons and stuff), it seems fun” >> “Oh, it’s doable after all” >> ” I will continue to run because I don’t want to waste the few weeks of training I’ve already done” >> “I want to run because it makes me feel good” >> ” I want to run because…I want to run” >> It is addicting indeed.
7. I can’t wait to do my first 5K, they say running for medals and treats and the finish line itself is a totally different world altogether and I want to be able to know what it feels like to be there. Most of all, I want to be fit enough to do a second one and a third. The ultimate goal in my bucket list is to run and raise funds for breast cancer research and prostate cancer research in honor of my brave parents who continue to give these diseases their big strong fights.
8. At this point, I’m taking it one day at a time. Slowly but surely. I would like to see how far I can push myself, but I am also realistic and aware that I need to take calculated risks because of some limitations with my heart.
See you at the finish line(s)?